Pretty When You Cry
by LadyDakota
Summary: Gilead is within you. Aunt Lydia would say. She was wrong. Gilead was wrong. This is the story of a wife within Gilead. A picture perfect bride or a picture perfect mask? Her husband could never be sure, but he was going to find out. They both would. Adult themes within.
1. Chapter 1: Soldier On

Please note: I do not own most of the characters within this story. They belong to the Handmaid's Tale. Brooklyn and Jasper are mine though.

 **Pretty When You Cry**

 **Chapter 1: Soldier On**

Soldier by Fleurie

 _"Solider keep on marching on_  
 _Head down till the work is done_  
 _Waiting on the morning sun_  
 _Solider keep on marching on_

 _Head in the dust, feet in the fire_  
 _Labour on that midnight wire_  
 _Listening for that angel choir_  
 _You got nowhere to run"_

God. Running. Home. These were the constant three things always running through her mind. Brooklyn Blake had been running for more than two years. Escaping her fate to glorify God. Brooklyn put God before man as the Bible had commanded. So when a lustful Commander told her she was to be a handmaid when she was a virgin simply because he was married and could not marry her, she ran from home.

She was now twenty three. Older than most wives, but she still somewhat felt entitled to be one due to her virginity. At this point, she considered it to be a dream. Unattainable, but she understood fully she rather be persecuted by man than God. One other thing against Brooklyn is that she was a doctor. A fertility specialist at that. She was the youngest female doctor the world had ever produced and even though she had the option to be a world renown surgeon she had focused her mind on neonatal and fertility medicine.

Home was one thing she missed more than anything. She missed the warmth of South Carolina, the beach, and most of all her garden. There was always something so powerful about being able to nourish and sustain herself without the help of others. More than that, it was how her clinic was so successful. Before Gilead, Brooklyn was the most sought after fertility specialist in the country. She had a 90% success rate, failing only to what the body could not repair. What the environment destroyed. What humankind allowed to what could have been, even still could be extinction.

None of this mattered though, she was in Maryland now. Hiding from all that was Gilead. It was colder than what she was used to and she groaned as her green eyes looked to the morning sky. Silently contemplating how much longer she could keep this up. It was the middle of winter, plants were not growing as a result and she was losing weight. She couldn't decide which was worse being hungry or being cold.

And then she heard it, the rumbling of a vehicle. Her body instantly reacted, springing her from her makeshift bed to her feet. Brooklyn barely had time to grab her thick black coat and backpack. It didn't matter and Brooklyn somehow knew that. She had been praying most of the night before. She had been desperately praying to be saved. It had been so long and she knew her body physically couldn't continue on.

She watched from the second story window of the abandoned school. A few men, Angels she had guessed had exited the black SUV. Possibly even a Commander. Though not Commander Barnes and for that alone she was grateful. A feeling deep in her stomach told her to go to them and she did. They were shocked to say the least. The tall one with harsh light blue eyes surprised her.

Instead of the usual rough treatment he had ordered the men to be gentle. Her hands were handcuffed in front of her body and no leather gag had been ordered. She sat in the middle seat of the SUV in the back, her eyes glued to the windows as she took in the warmth. One last look at the world, she mused to herself. Her hands reached up weakly for the gold cross that hung her from her neck.

"Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, I will help you, yes, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." she whispered to comfort herself.

The man with the harsh eyes turned from his seat in the front to look at her. Brooklyn was not aware as her eyes still were glued to the window. He studied her intently, he had known how long she had been running and even he had been curious as to why she had kept going more north into Gilead rather than to Canada. Much about this case seemed off, on all accounts. The initial Commander who reported her was currently in custody as of two weeks ago. This woman was needed for further testimony. Her answers determined her fate, if her whispers were anything of who she truly was she had nothing to fear.

The SUV stopped finally after 20 minutes, Brooklyn instantly missed the heat the moment she stepped out. The building was fairly modern and looked new. Which was surprising, even with the war still going Gilead was strong enough to build infrastructure. Brooklyn was placed in a room with two chairs and a table, an interrogation room she knew. Thankfully, she did not have to wait long and the room was warm. The man entered again, with a glass of water and some bread. He sat it in front of her before taking his seat.

"I'm Commander Jasper Walker. You must be Dr. Brooklyn Blake? Is that correct?" His voice was deep and stern, as piercing as his eyes were. He then motioned to the food before her. "You should eat."

Brooklyn finally remembered to breathe and then nodded. "I was Dr. Brooklyn Blake. Not a doctor anymore. Thank you for the food." She replied, slight bitterness to her soft voice. Slowly she picked apart the bread and ate very slowly.

"We've been looking for you for a long time, but you knew that. Can you tell us why you ran from the Red Center in Charleston?"

Brooklyn swallowed and smiled. "It's not going to matter, you'll end up like Thompson and his men. Honestly it might be in your best interest to let me go."

"Commander Barnes is in custody awaiting trial for treason and lustful sin." He took in her face and honestly the small woman looked relieved.

"Barnes knew I was a virgin because of the testing, and as we both know they are married off. He...wanted me and we both know he is married. He had the doctors forge the paperwork and I was sent to be a handmaid. His handmaid she told me all about him, his demands..." She paused to take a drink and looked up to the Commander. "I rather be persecuted by man than by God. I am to only give myself to my husband, he was not my husband. So... I did what I felt was right. To live by God."

"The reports seemed to be correct about your whereabouts in the beginning, but then became sporadic about the time Commander Thompson and his crew were murdered. What can you tell me about that?"

She swallowed again. "He was a nice man, he actually listened to me. I was in his custody for... A week maybe and then Barnes came, the building was set on fire from the outside. Thompson I guess had been asking too many questions. And he was trying to get me up north to my brother so I could be rechecked by the doctors and resorted." She paused and took a breath. "The Angels took my cuffs off and he told me to just run. I never looked back, but I knew I just knew..." Tears dropped down her cheeks and she wiped them away on her sleeves.

"Commander Barnes reported that you started the fire from the inside, which was never well believed but of course why more attention was brought on your capture. The building has been formerly investigated and the fire indeed started from the outside. Your testimony will be used in his trial and was the last piece we needed. You will be examined by a doctor later to confirm your health and virginity. It will be up to Judgement whether or not you will be persecuted or placed else where."

"By else where you mean the Colonies?" Her eyes met his. He was surprised to see there was no fear. Maybe she had no longer feared death. "It could mean a number of things, Ms. Blake. You're also the best fertility doctor in the country in which your practice of medicine aligns with the teachings of Gilead."

"But I'm a woman." she exclaimed sadly. "Rare exceptions can be made. Blessed day Ms. Blake. We'll speak later." Brooklyn bowed her head. "Blessed day, Commander Walker."

The day went by quickly after that. The doctors examined her. She weighed 80 pounds, they told her. It hit her hard that she was on the verge of starving to death. She was shorter at 5'2", but even then she knew a healthy BMI was to be at least 105 pounds. "You're still fertile, a virgin, and when you get proper nutrition your menstrual cycle should begin again. I'm advising a regimen of vitamins." he told her. "Would it be possible for a smoothie to be made?" she asked and he smiled. "I knew you were given bread when you arrived. With your lack of hydration it probably is best."

The doctor must have known who she was, because he took her to the kitchen to make her smoothie. She chose bananas, spinach, green apples, blue berries, and kale. He smiled and had the Martha make it. "I'm surprised you didn't ask for any nuts on the side." She smiled. "I do need lipids, but I'm assuming you know I'm vegan. Also I didn't want to overstep." He nodded. "I was originally a Pediatrician, but I had read some of your studies on development and diet. Especially your pieces on pregnant women and veganism.". She drank her smoothie slowly and then smiled when he handed her a few pecans.

Later on in the day she was given new clothes. A long white dress to her relief. Her jeans would be missed, she couldn't deny that. The dress was warm to her relief. Much later, when the sun had set she was summoned to dinner. All eyes were on her as she entered and took a seat. Brooklyn half expected to be surrounded by men, but there were a few wives and of course Mathas serving. She was surprised to see Commander Walker didn't have a wife sitting next to him.

"Brooklyn it's so nice to meet you. I'm Commander Fred Waterford. I was on my way back from DC, staying here for the night." A man said, probably late in his 30s to early 40s with dark hair. He had a very distinct look to him despite what should have been plain features.

"Hello!" she replied cheerfully, which caught most off guard. Most expected her to be shaking in fear and meek. "It's nice to meet you sir. Are you far from your home?"

Waterford smiled at her demeanor. "Just Massachusetts. Your brother is there. He's been briefed and very happy you've been found relatively safe and sound."

Her eyes lit up at the realization Matthew was still alive. "Is Matthew well? I figured he would do so well within Gilead." she replied, as she brought her spoon of soup to her mouth and drank.

"You're certainly not wrong. He's a Commander now." Waterford replied with a wink. "And his wife is pregnant, thanks to you he reported."

Brooklyn smiled at the last bit. "Praise be. They followed the vitamin and diet regimen I suggested then. This is such amazing news. Thank you Commander Waterford."

Commander Walker studied her and her every reaction. Dinner wasn't just to be nice, it gave everyone a chance to provide input on her judgement. So far it was going great, which surprised him. For someone who ran so long, he had half expected her to put up a fight. She never once did. She was graceful, elegant, and surprisingly submissive. Like a true Gilead woman should be, she intrigued him to say the least.

"So tell me Brooklyn, when we pulled up to the school why didn't you run like you normally would?" Commander Walker asked, his deep voice seemed to boom through out the room causing all eyes to gravitate towards the small woman. It was a question they all wanted the answer to. The room was then silent.

Without missing a beat, Brooklyn smiled again and her dark green eyes meet his light blue. "I was starving, cold, and I knew I couldn't continue on for much longer so I prayed. I prayed for many hours for a sign. For salvation and you came."

"And you think Gilead is your salvation?" He replied, his light eyes seeming to darken with the implications.

"I trust in God above all things and if he has brought me to Gilead, then it is his will." She didn't even blink even with all eyes on her.

The room fell silent and then a wife spoke. "I will pray for your judgement sweet girl. You are what a true wife should be. May God bless you." Brooklyn looked to her and smiled.

"Thank you. I just hope I'm given that chance. I've always wanted children. It's the one thing I can give back to the world to truly make it a wonderful place."

Walker look to her again, his voice direct. "Why weren't you married before Gilead came to be?"

Brooklyn blushed and shook her head. "Honestly... There wasn't a man who valued my values and loved God as I do." She paused and looked up finally. "I'm sure you can remember from the time before...the...wickedness of it. The younger generation of men only cared for the act of procreation as you can imagine."

Waterford laughed and sighed. "I do believe Mrs. Sawyer is correct. You are going to make some lucky man an amazing wife. It's been very challenging to find women from your age group who are unmarried and pure as you are."

"As you can remember, God and traditional values were massively attacked by the modern media. The young sheep chose wrong. They chose the easy life. They chose sin. And now they see the wages of sin is death. Now they are handmaids or in the Colonies." She paused and took a drink. "They called me meek back then, even when I was 10 years old and in medical school. Little do they know the meek shall inherit the Earth."

Waterford finished his drink and smiled. It was a small cheers to her, she knew. "So they shall. I think someone's judgement is going to go quite well."

Most of the wives looked up and smiled to her with hope. Commander Walker was silent and Brooklyn wasn't sure what to make of it. She was confident she had answered every question correctly. It was evident on all their faces and she was great at reading people. He continued to study her for the rest of the night, even when she was sharing recipes with the wives. Though why the wives had asked evaded him. Most of them never cooked. They had Marthas for that.

A week later, her judgement concluded in Massachusetts with Commander Waterford, Walker, and her brother watching. Innocent. To her it was nearly music to hear those words. Though one thing bothered her. She was to be married. To a stranger. All she could wonder was when and who. Would he be kind? Would he be a truthful god fearing man? Or a man fearing all men that was lying about his love of God.

So many questions filled her mind as she stared blankly at the ceiling of the gym in the Red Center. She had been staying her for the week, waiting for her salvation. Tomorrow would be new. Tomorrow she would be home with her brother Matthew until she was to married. Either way, she was blessed she reminded herself as she heard a girl sobbing into her pillow. Gillian had slapped Aunt Elizabeth who then beat the girl within an inch of her life. No matter what tomorrow brought, at least she wasn't going to be a handmaid. The thought made her smile. That was one bullet dodged among many. How many were to come? She didn't know, didn't care to be honest. The girl had God and God had her. Maybe she was going to be what all women aspired to be in Gilead, she thought grimly. Her thoughts faded as she finally fell asleep.

At the Waterford residence, Fred and Jasper were having a drink. Scotch neat. "How's the new handmaid?" Walker asked as he selected a record from the shelf. David Bowie- I'm afraid of Americans. "Pretty. Blonde. Quiet, probably thanks to Serena. Maybe you are smarter staying unmarried." Waterford replied with a scoff. "Can't dodge that bullet forever I'm afraid. I barely got out of the last Prayvaganza." Walker recalled with a flinch.

Waterford laughed and shook his head. "You are one of the very few unmarried Commanders in the region. Pryce loves his marriages." Walker put the record on and cringed again. "I want a woman, not a child."

"Not very many choices on that front. You're nearing mid thirties. The oldest one we had was twenty five and she was married off yesterday as you know. I think Brooklyn is now the oldest and we both know that was a rare find." Waterford said as he looked up from his drink.

"She's absolute perfection. Not sure if her brother would let go of her so easily and quickly." Walker said before taking another drink.

"You're higher on the command chain. Not much he can say if we're being honest." Waterford's brows raised as he spoke. A smug grin followed. "Besides if Pryce knew that would lock you down in holy matrimony, he'd have a ceremony right now."

Walker thought for a second, time wasn't on his hands and neither was selection. If he didn't ask fast someone else would swoop in and she'd be gone. He glared momentarily at the thought. "If you sell Pryce on it... I'd love to have her." Waterford looked up with a sly grin, pleased with his response. "Done. When would you like to collect your bride for the wedding?"

That didn't take much, Walker thought with an eye roll. "Two weeks or more. She needs to adjust to Gilead and I need to get both houses ready." Which was true, he had a nice house in city and an even bigger one a little outside of the city.

Another week passed before Commander Pryce agreed. Quite a few men had put their names in the hat for the woman's hand in marriage. Jasper was the oldest and highest ranking. Not to mention he had Fred Waterford in his corner. A month and she would all his.

Brooklyn was in the garden with Mrs. Blake, her brother's wife Nina, when she was told. Aunt Lydia was happy and smiling, which first scared Brooklyn a little.

"Praise be. What a glorious day it is dear." She beamed.

"Yes, it's a beautiful day Aunt Lydia." Brooklyn greeted with a raised brow. Something was up, which if it's news coming from an Aunt... It was never good.

"I have such happy news dear sweet girl." Lydia was smiling even wider. To the point Brooklyn and Nina looked at each other with concern.

"Oh?" was all Brooklyn could manage.

"You are to be married at the end of the month." Lydia bent down and hugged her. Brooklyn quite literally paled and hugged back weakly.

"To who?" Brooklyn's voice was barely above a whisper.

"Me." Walker's voice came from behind her. Brooklyn visibly jumped, not expecting him.

She released the older woman and turned slowly, still on her knees. Walker offered her a hand and helped her to her feet. "Praise be and may God make me truly worthy of such a husband." Her words were sweet, but her face was a blank canvas. Walker couldn't read her as he did everyone else. Always a surprise was she.


	2. Chapter 2: Pretty When You Cry

Please note: I do not own most of the characters within this story. They belong to the Handmaid's Tale. Brooklyn and Jasper are mine though.

 **Also this an adult topic chapter covering rape. Be advised.**

 **Chapter 2: Pretty When You Cry**

 _"And the moon gives me_

 _Permission and I enter_

 _Through her eyes_  
 _She's losing her virginity and_  
 _All her will to compromise_

 _I didn't want to hurt you baby_  
 _I didn't want to hurt you_  
 _I didn't want to hurt you_  
 _But you're pretty when you cry_

 _I didn't want to fuck you baby_  
 _I didn't want to fuck you_  
 _I didn't want to fuck you_  
 _But you're pretty_  
 _When you're mine"_

"Ordinary' is what you are used to. This may not seem ordinary to you now, but after a time it will. It will become ordinary."- Aunt Lydia's words echoed though Brooklyn's mind as she looked at her surroundings. She prayed this would never be ordinary. Her life had been a constant state of fear since Gilead came to be.

Lately, her time consisted of the Red Center, Matthew's home, and her soon to be homes with Jasper. It would be late winter or early spring when she would be able to get the land ready for her small farm. Jasper was kind enough to give her an acre at the lake house. As well as a greenhouse at both homes. Her biggest hurdle was building an aqua tank for her seaweed to grow. But she had talked him into it.

Time was counting down though, and it had marked now three years since Gilead came to be. Offred had reminded her that earlier today. Aunt Lydia wasn't the biggest fan of her being around the Handmaids, but it also freed up her time. She suggested Brooklyn might even be a good influence on the girls. The thought made Brooklyn laugh. If only she knew.

"A week left until you're married. How are you feeling?" Offred asked as they sorted through groceries.

"Nervous. Although the wedding night is nothing compared to what you ladies go through... I'm still not looking forward to it."

Offred smiled, not many wives would acknowledge the ceremonial monthly rapes her fellow handmaids went through. Most wives considered the handmaids to be whores, as if they welcomed the rape. Nothing could be more far from the truth.

"Not entirely true, you're fertile. You'll have to have sex with him once a month, only you won't have another woman holding you down."

"No... just him. Though which is worse your own husband or the commander you serve?" Brooklyn mused as she carefully put some asparagus in her bag.

Offred's eyebrows rose as she thought. "Hmm good question. One is personal and one is not. Depends on the person's psyche. I get to leave after a year. You're there forever. Never thought I'd be debating with a wife about rape though."

"Oh but it's not rape... not when you're their property. Not in Gilead. No. No. No." Brooklyn tsked as she spoke with a smirk.

Offred smiled and as Ofglen approached, they both fell silent. _Pious shit_ , Offred thought with a smirk and gave Brooklyn a look.

"We've been sent good weather." Ofglen said meekly.

Eye rolls ensued. "Praise be and good harvest." Brooklyn acknowledged.

The next day, Brooklyn heard the bells tolling. A particicution, she knew and sighed. Another reason she was happy to be a wife. Nina was down in the kitchen, preparing their smoothies.

"You're up earlier than usual." Brooklyn remarked with a smile as she took her smoothie.

"The baby refused to let me sleep." Nina replied with a sigh.

"Home stretch time though. Need to be adjusted?"

Nina smiled. "Yes, also baby yoga?"

"Of course. After you give birth, I'll teach you a few things. I'll be next in line for a baby as we know."

After the smoothies, Brooklyn popped Nina's neck. Though the medical term was a Palmer diversified rotary break. She continued on her back, having Nina on her hands and knees. Nina seemed to feel better afterwards.

"Wished we could have kept you longer." Nina sighed.

"I'll be at the end of the street. Don't worry."

"Are they allowing you to practice medicine?" Nina asked as they got into positions for yoga.

"Trial run with three couples. I'm seeing them later today. I'll be able to read and write again. I have a year to get them all pregnant."

"Lucky." Nina sighed. "Know anything about the couples?"

"One is an Angel. One doctor. One commander."

"They all agreed to do the dietary?" Nina asked, looking over at Brooklyn.

"It's part of the terms and conditions of the program. I explained it before they accepted. The doctor couple was really easy to accept."

"You're gonna have to be stern as fuck with the Marthas. Good luck." Nina spoke with experience. It took their own Martha months to understand what vegan meant.

"Marthas are nothing. It took a good maneuvering to get the approval for treating the men. Hard to argue while God made man susceptible to the same corruption that ravaged a woman's body infertile all due to sin."

"Yikes, you're smart. If you had argued science you wouldn't have won it."

Brooklyn's eyes rolled. "Deeply aware. If anything thank God I read the entire Bible, otherwise I'd be fucked."

"Not yet, but give it a week. Lucky bitch, that editic memory has came in handy." Nina laughed. This is how they always spoke to each since they were kids. Best friends since they could talk really. "Also might wanna tone down on putting on muscle."

Brooklyn had put on 20 lbs and most of it was muscle. "Meh. Have to build up the cardiac muscles, and uh... well we both know there isn't a sure way to do that so... "

"Yeah, but be careful with Jasper. He seems like a snake... Like he's really big in the Sons of Jacob."

"Oh I can tell. But it's easy to fit in here. Quote the bible, appear to be pious, smile, and keep your head down."

"Pretty much Gilead Survival 101." Nina agreed.

The rest of the day was spent at the hospital, advising the couples and their Marthas. Later she would have to visit each household to teach the Marthas individually. Luckily the men's sperm weren't as bad as she thought. Low mobility, but most would take about 3 months to get back into shape. Counts varied. The Horace couple had the worst of it. They had high fat, high meat diets.

Horace was an up and coming Angel, wanting to be a commander. A pregnant wife would look good for him and the couple did not want a handmaid. They made it blatantly clear. The Nelson couple were both doctors, the wife not practicing of course, but the husband sought her out the moment the news spread. The last couple was interesting. The commander had a handmaid, but clearly felt guilty. Commander Parson seemed like a good guy.

Brooklyn also advised them on greenhouses and growing their own food. Their diet was strict vegan, however she did say if they had to have meat. They could do fish once a week. Preferably salmon. She had to stress to them to pay attention to their Marthas, especially since they'd be bad about the dairy restrictions and Brooklyn had to explain the hormonal damage dairy did. Lastly, she informed them of a natural vitamin mix she'd be incorporating once her garden was up and running.

"Will this really work you think?" Commander Parsons asked.

"Yes. Keep in mind this is not an instant fix. We're literally repairing your body from the inside. And success from my clinic went from 3 months to a year and half. And out of those pregnancies 80% carried full term, and even those who didn't were close, and were healthy provided the family stayed on the protocol. Even the preemies did excellent."

"Were there any couples you couldn't help?"Mrs. Horace asked.

"Very few. The only ones I couldn't help were the ones where it was physically impossible. Low egg counts, non ovulating, Ovarian or tubal ruptures, on the women's side. Men wise, it was usually due to them not adhering to the guidelines. Physically all of you are capable to conceive, so it's basically going to be how well you follow what's prescribed and how well your body reacts. Some will be faster than others and that's ok." Brooklyn replied with a smile.

"Praise be. May God bless you and your coming marriage." Mrs. Horace replied.

The week seemed to fly by. Work did that, she reminded herself as Nina helped her into her wedding dress. The dress reminded her of an egg. _The egg will break tonight._ She thought grimly. "Just breathe... pretend you're somewhere else. Somewhere happy." Nina squeezed her shoulders.

"I just wanted to be in love... Like you and Matthew. Was it too much to ask? Was I truly being too selfish for God to grant me that?" Brooklyn asked, her eyes rimming with tears.

Nina turned to her and wiped her eyes before the tears could fall. "Remember you always told me God has a reason for everything. He has a reason for this and though you may suffer now, he will bring forth his blessings. Some way, some how."

Matthew entered the room and huffed when he seen Brooklyn. "I wish things could have been different. I know you wanted this to be so different... Better. But you be brave. You were always dad's warrior princess. Make him proud." He took her hand and squeezed it before he and his wife surrounded her in a hug. Not long after, all eyes were on her as she walked down the isle. Seldomly, did a large wedding of one couple happen. This clued Brooklyn on just how tall on the totem pole Jasper really was.

After walking down the isle, Brooklyn realized just how much she missed her mom and dad. Both were in Canada ready to fight Gilead. Her dad was a general for the US army currently in his sixties. She was proud of him. She hoped he'd be proud of her. "Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes." (Psalms 37:7) She whispered to herself shortly before arriving at the alter.

Jasper seemed to be pleased, she could see that much from her veil. He took her hand as Commander Pryce and the priest spoke. Brooklyn was vaguely paying attention, but felt a shock upon contact with his hand.

"Do you, Brooklyn, take his man to be your husband under the eyes of God and man till death do you part?"

Brooklyn inhaled, feeling the shackles of the world upon her as spoke softly. " I do."

"And do, Jasper, take this women to be your wife under the eyes of God and man till death do you part?"

There was no hesitation, not even an inhale of breath. "I do."

They exchanged gold rings and he bent forward, lifting her veil. Brooklyn shyly smiled before he kissed her and the room exploded into applause. "Who can find a wife of noble character? She is far more precious than rubies. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will lack nothing of value. She will bring him good and not harm all the days of her life." (Proverbs 31:10-12) He whispered to her as they walked up the isle together, and with that he took her hand.

The reception was at his, no their she corrected herself, house in town that was on the corner from Nina and Matthew. It was absolutely filled to the roof with people. So many Brooklyn had lost count. She had met Commanders and wives from all over the country. Even from back home in South Carolina. They were extremely apologetic to her situation and what occurred with Commander Barnes. Brooklyn had a feeling that was a lingering stain for Gilead and this marriage was a way for Gilead to make amends.

The most notable attendees were Commander Waterford, Putnam, Rawlings, Parsons, and Pryce with all of their wives of course. Rawlings had come a long way from South Carolina and the two knew each other. She was the reason he had children with his wife Jenny. Jenny was currently six months pregnant which made Brooklyn smile. It also made her current six patients smile as well, as Rawlings and Jenny spoke to them. Jasper was even paying attention with a look of pride on his face.

As the party began dying down, she was introduced to her new staff. Sesily, a Martha, a black woman well into her mid 40s with a very welcoming smile. In another life Brooklyn could have sworn she'd be a model. Another Martha, name Cindy who was also in her mid 40s with long blonde hair, dark drown almost black eyes, and Brooklyn could have sworn was a fan of plastic surgery. Cindy didn't seem as friendly, she noted. And finally their driver, Tobias who was quiet and taller than Jasper. He was also black like Sesily and Brooklyn could have sworn they were family with similar facial features. Jasper also mentioned another Martha at the lake house by the name of April.

Towards the end, she got to see offred. Offred smiled as always and she smiled back. "You ready for tonight?" Offred greeted.

"No. But that doesn't matter." Brooklyn scoffed with a snicker.

"Your wedding had a huge turn out, biggest one I've ever seen. I imagine you'll have a very interesting baby shower."

"Provided he's not sterile." came Brooklyn's quick reply.

"You really wanting a kid in all this?" Offred asked with a worried look.

"Yes. And hopefully all boys." Brooklyn replied with an obvious look. They both knew what it meant to be a woman here. No choices, no options, just be a good girl or suffer greatly.

"You'll get through this. Just breathe baby girl. I know you're nervous." Offred smiled.

"I know, just wanted this whole thing to be different. Ya know. Love. I wanted love."

"Most of us want this whole thing to be different. You'll be ok."

Aunt Lydia made her way over with a smile and a few wives trailing behind her. Lydia smiling, killed her every time and was one of the most dreaded sites on Earth. Truly, never a good thing.

"Come dear sweet girl we need to get you ready for tonight." Aunt Lydia explained as she took Brooklyn's arm and lead her upstairs to the bedroom. With all the wives following.

The bedroom was really nice, Brooklyn thought as she was ushered in. The bed was a canopy bed, with very light wood, with gold and white linens. It seemed more welcoming than the dark and scary room she had imagined. She figured Jasper would be one for darker touches when it came to decor. The women took down her hair and helped her into her nightgown.

"You have such beautiful hair." Serena Joy complimented as she brushed it.

"Thank you." Brooklyn smiled.

"Are you nervous?" Serena asked

"Little bit." Brooklyn nodded.

"You're doing god's great work tonight girl, don't be nervous. Perhaps your pain will be well rewarded with a little one of your own by tonight's work." Aunt Lydia chimmed in.

It took every ounce of mental strength within Brooklyn to not slap Aunt Lydia right there and then. "Blessed be the fruit tonight then." And every ounce of mental strength to smile.

Nina was smiling and shaking her head as she pulled back the blankets and laid the cloth on the bed. It reminded Brooklyn of being back in the 1700s when proof was required of the bride with blood. Oh how society had regressed, she thought. Nina then helped her into bed.

"You'll be ok sis. You're strong." Nina then kissed her forehead as the women cleared to leave.

It was the longest five minutes of her life as she waited for Jasper to enter the room. He was quiet, when he entered. Which surprised Brooklyn, for a tall man he was surprisingly graceful. Or military, she thought as she continued to watch him. "Don't be nervous, I'll take care of you Brooklyn."

"Sorry just not as ready as I thought I'd be. Even though I know what's going to happen."

"Feeling is quite different than knowing." He smirked as he pulled his pants and shirt off to get into bed. He grabbed her chin and kissed her softly. While they were kissing, he began pushing her night gown up.

Before she knew it, he was on top of her. "Wait." she protested. She wasn't ready. "We can't wait forever darlin'." And with that he entered her. He was bigger than average and thick and she knew it. She screamed with tears in her eyes, which then looked to window catching the full moon. In those moments she tried to remember every single happy moment she had with the moon to escape her reality.

She remembered the ocean and her nightly walks, the calm and serene feeling it gave her as the ocean waves hit her toes with it's cool water. Late night swims without a care in the world. America. The beautiful America they all took for granted. The bipartisan nightmare that tore her from her every day life. If only both parties could have accepted each other instead of the hatred that flowed between them both. It's how the Sons of Jacob won. Exploiting the weakness, the fear, and the stupid hatred between both political parties.

Jasper drew her from her thoughts, by grabbing her chin and kissing her. _Romance now. Really?_ She thought bitterly. He was demanding her attention and she hated him for it. She wanted to drift away in happy thoughts, she wanted to ignore what he was doing to her body without her permission. She was too scared to call it rape. The actual word of admitting what happened scared her. She wanted to scream, to hit him, and to push him off her. She wanted to be away from here.

And then it happened, her own body betrayed her as she orgasmed and he looked to her with a smug grin. "See not so bad after all. You feel so good baby. Like heaven." He whispered in her ear. _And this is absolute hell._ She thought defiantly. Brooklyn was careful, oh so careful to keep her face as neutral as possible. This was as close being unmasked as she had ever been. Finally he came, and she felt it. She always said she wanted children, but this was scary. He then went to his side of the bed and rolled to his side, looking at her. He then pulled down her nightgown and gave her belly a rub. "I know tonight was rough, but it'll get better. You'll love me in time and I will love you and especially our children."

"I hope so. I don't know what I'd do if you never loved me." It was the sweetest lie she ever told and she for one did not feel guilty. She wasn't about to feel one bit guilty about anything she was about to do. America was her home and she was determined to get it back. If one truly wanted to destroy something, you did it form the inside. She was close the head and heart of Gilead, and she would rot this this beast from the inside out. She smiled as the beast pulled her to him to cuddle and fall asleep. The thought of Gilead's destruction kept her up a little longer, but when she did sleep nightmares didn't haunt her.

The sunlight and Cindy woke her from her treasured sleep. Her refuge from the reality of Gilead and all the hell it contained. The Martha had drew the curtains back, Jasper had woken an hour ago."Get up your husband is downstairs eating breakfast." Cindy declared rudely.

Brooklyn freshly awake with no coffee, sat up and glared. The mask was off as Brooklyn grabbed her chin and squeezed hard. "If you ever speak to me like that again it will be the last time you have a tongue." Brooklyn then shoved the woman back hard. And then Brooklyn studied the woman, and something seemed off. Brooklyn couldn't put her finger on it, but she was going to find out. She then got out of bed. "Well make the bed you impatient bitch." Brooklyn huffed as she opened the closet, grabbed a dress. "Sesily will do it, when she's done with the dishes." Brooklyn laughed. Sesily seemed to do a lot and this woman so little. "No you will. Now." Brooklyn pointed to the bed.

The woman hesitated, so Brooklyn pushed her towards the bed before she started working. Brooklyn stretched, tossing her nightgown off and Cindy looked at her. The older woman was surprised to see so much muscle on her. "I thought they found you starving." Brooklyn smiled at the comment. "Indeed. I bounce back fast and mama didn't raise a weak bitch." The woman laughed as she lifted the cloth which held her blood from the night before. "Yet you were a virgin til last night, she certainly didn't raise a bad bitch."

Brooklyn laughed again, dress now over her head and smoothed out. "And this is why you're making my bed and cleaning my house. Drop the attitude."

She looked in the mirror, recognizing her old self it made her smile and also reminded her to slip her mask back on. She put her hair in a braided bun, stretched and then made her way to the dining room.

Sesily brought her a cup of coffee. Black with honey as sweetener. This woman was a god send. "Good morning everyone and thank you." Brooklyn said cheerfully after taking a drink and feeling her very soul return to her body. Coffee always did that for her.

Jasper looked up his paper and smiled. "Good morning sweetheart. Any plans for today?"

 _Oh that's cute you rape me the night before and are oh so kind the next morning._ "Well training the Marthas in how I eat and how they need to prepare our meals and then tending to our gardens."

"And you're aware you're still a doctor and can see your patients right?" Jasper replied with a smirk. "We're married, but as long as it doesn't interfere with our children once they come... then you're set to keep practicing."

Brooklyn smirked. "Speaking of...you still need to do your check up with me to ensure we have those beautiful children."

He paled a little and shook his head. "You don't forget about anything do you?"

"Nope." She smirked. "Whenever you're ready. Also they're preparing me an office here. So you know where to go."

"How about tonight sweetie?"

Brooklyn smiled and nodded. "Perfect." Sesily brought her a smoothie. Which Brooklyn thanked her for.

"Time for work sweetheart. I'll see you later." Jasper walked over and kissed her forehead. And then they heard a loud crash of dishes breaking. Cindy had been carrying from the kitchen and dropped them.

"Sorry sir." She quickly dropped down to pick up the mess.

"And ma'am. I have a wife now and you need to respect her as much as you do me." Jasper reminded her sternly. The woman nodded and quickly left the room.

Brooklyn's head tilted. "Interesting." she said sarcastically while giving a questioning look. Jasper looked at her. It was the first time she was anything, but quoting the bible and being a robot. There was something different about his wife. He wanted to know her more, but it was going to take time.

Brooklyn spent the rest of the day making her greenhouse her haven. The new tank for the seaweed was exceptional and she was glad, even more glad to have the seaweed already planted and growing. Even her spot made her yoga and working out was good. Nice and cushioned. All the trees had been planted. Although she knew no progress would be made on them until the spring. What worried her even more was the vineyard at the lake house. If she had to be in Gilead, at least she was going to be drunk she decided.

She was doing yoga, when Sesily came running in. "Sorry to bother you ma'am the Putnam's handmaid went into labor. They'll expect you there." Brooklyn shook her head and sighed. "Why?" Sesily smiled. "Oh yeah you wouldn't know. It's customary for the other wives to be supportive of the other's having babies." Brooklyn laughed."Well ok then, let me get cleaned up."


	3. Chapter 3: Bad Dream

Hey guys. Long time, no update. Sorry. Hurricane Florence has left 3 feet of water in my condo and I'm still not home. Also I have made a playlist on spotify for the story. It's labeled Pretty When You Cry fanfic. I tend to listen to it and add to it when writing which is why I always post a chapter with song lyrics. Thank you for the reviews, please keep them coming. Also Celticank: We will explore into Brooklyn's past life more in the coming chapters. We'll get a nice scare bit next chapter.

Warning: Oh and hey there is a slight lemon at the end.

Please note: I do not own most of the characters within this story. They belong to The Handmaid's Tale, Margaret Atwood, and Hulu. Brooklyn and Jasper are mine though.

Chapter 3: Bad Dream

"Feels like I'm falling, into a world

Into a world I can't control

I hear it calling

Down in my soul

Gripping my bones

It won't let go

Wake me up

Won't you wake me up?

Caught in a bad dream

Caught in a bad dream

Wake me up

I wanna feel the sun"

The "birthing" process for the wives was absolutely incredulous. Brooklyn was in complete shock at the sheer audacity of Naomi Putnam mimicking labor. Apparently many of the wives did this. It wasn't bad enough they helped rape a woman once a month, oh no they had to steal the births as well. Her eyes did connect with Offred's at one point, who had a smirk on her face. These bitches kill me, Brooklyn mouthed to her. Which caused an ever bigger smile from Offred. At that moment she felt incredibly thankful she didn't have to subject another woman to this torture and hell.

Brooklyn made her way upstairs to the Handmaid's to check on Janine. One could only "bond" with these delusional women for so long before she had an inner urge to murder them all in various different ways and degrees of pain. Janine looked good when she entered, all things considered. Brooklyn admired her strength, no matter how mentally fragile the woman may be. Janine might be batshit crazy by all accounts at times, but she made labor her bitch. She reminded Brooklyn of a goddess in this moment, taking control of her pain.

Things went quickly from there, and baby Charlotte "Angela" was born within the hour. The moment the baby was ripped away from Janine sparked even more hatred within Brooklyn. The look on her face, the loneliness and sadness despite all her pain and hard work was for nothing. All for the selfish Naomi to have a child. She was not worthy of such a precious sweet baby. Within a few minutes the baby was screaming with hunger and the child returned to her mother. Nature and natural order restored, Brooklyn thought with a smile. Serena Joy caught the smile and Brooklyn smirked back at her. Not much she could do or prove, and it excited Brooklyn all the more.

Once home finally, she was eating mashed potatoes with veggie meatballs when Jasper walked in. He seemed chipper, probably heard about the new baby. Babies were always a huge celebration. The zealots always loved a good birth. Brooklyn took a nice big drink of her red wine.

"Praise be. God granted us a miracle today." he said with a smile as he placed his laptop next to his plate.

"That he did. A healthy one at that." She smiled like she meant it. Life was relished, even here by her in Gilead.

"I'd also like to be part of such a miracle. We have one more peak night." His eyebrows rose.

Oh how her eyes wanted to roll, but she was too mentally strong. "Blessed be the fruit then." She said with a smile.

Sesily took her plate and replaced with a bowl of fruit as Cindy poured his wine.

"Oh may the Lord open." He snickered.

Cindy stopped pouring and almost glared. "That's highly inappropriate."

Brooklyn's head tilted as Jasper and the woman glared at each other. She shook her head and downed her wine. Hoping it wasn't what she thought it was.

"Hardly. However, what is highly appropriate is you a Martha speaking to your Commander like that."

They both looked to her. He had a look of both shock and something that closely resembled pride. Cindy however was glaring. Brooklyn's eyebrows raised as she pursed her lips, something she rarely ever did.

"Only he can say that to me."

Brooklyn giggled, seeing red and then the empty wine glass in her hand was thrown. Glass shattered across Cindy's face and before anyone could move or react Brooklyn was already to her feet with a knife in one hand and Cindy's chin in the other.

Despite the fact Cindy was taller by a good five inches, Brooklyn looked absolutely menacing.

"I see you seemed to have forgotten the conversation we had about the natural order of this fine household." Brooklyn said as she pressed the knife to her lips, cutting slightly.

Jasper jumped straight up, his hand slipping over hers. "Darling, I think she gets it now. Don't you Cindy?"

Cindy took a deliberate breath, her eyes wide with fear. "Yessir. I'm so sorry ma'am it will never happen again."

"Be sure that it doesn't for your sake." Brooklyn then gracefully maneuvered between the two back to her seat where she then placed the knife down with a smile and began eating again as if nothing ever happened. Sesily smiled from the hallway which she caught of course.

"Oh and clean up this mess." she said cheerfully.

Jasper and Cindy gave each other a look before Cindy started cleaning.

"When they said I'd have a strong Gilead wife, I think it was an understatement." Jasper said as he took his seat again.

"A strong commander and a strong wife. We'll have beautifully strong children." She smiled and then looked directly at Cindy who was still cleaning. The older woman grimaced at the statement. "Don't you agree Cindy?" Brooklyn added, her face ever so neutral and innocent which was the complete opposite of the thoughts racing in her mind.

"Not my place to say ma'am." She replied quickly.

"Our Martha seems to not want our success... I don't know how well I can tolerate that to be honest. The home needs to be strong on all fronts, don't you agree darling husband?" Brooklyn then turned giving Jasper an innocently hopeful look.

"I have to agree. Cindy isn't yet used to the change in the household, she'll either have to get on board or go elsewhere."

Brooklyn smiled as she looked at Cindy, who had both a look of pain and anger. Weak, weak woman. Brooklyn thought as Sesily handed her a new glass of wine. Brooklyn could never stand a woman who couldn't keep her emotions in check. Her mother and grandmother taught her better.

The rest of the night went well. She slept with him, no choice really. It didn't bother her as much as the first night. Though she knew nothing ever really could. She watched the moon again. It reminded her that even if they had changed her country, they hold no value or threat to the heavens and stars. God held domain over all, not man. He cuddled again until they both fell asleep.

Before she knew it, two months had passed. It was unreal just how fast time could pass. Nina had the baby three weeks ago, a boy named Benjamin. Brooklyn delivered the baby at her brother and Nina's request. Brooklyn was more than happy to do it. Jasper and the household settled. Cindy avoided her and Sesily became her favorite. The two had much in common. Sesily was a surgical nurse prior to Gilead and that gave Brooklyn piece of mind. It had been two months since they were married and she had yet to have a period. Which wasn't a big deal since she hadn't had one since way before she came to Gilead.

Things were quickly escalating at the Putnam household which looked picture perfect to everyone but her and Offred. Who were now shopping.

"Do you think it's postpartum depression?" Offred asked as they threw oranges in her bag.

"As you've said she's never been quite sound mentally. Postpartum? No. Regular depression and stress from the situation, yes. Delusional most definitely. I'm worried for when they separate her from the baby."

Ofglen grimaced and shook her head. "Will be the straw to break the camels back as they say."

"How are you holding up?" Offred asked with a shrug. They knew there was no stopping the future. Everything was beyond their control at this point. It was best to strap in as best you could for the ride they called life.

"Pretty sure Jasper either is or has fucked the one Martha I was telling you about. No proof. He seems rather committed to me though." Brooklyn replied with a shrug.

"And uh... if they're still fucking?" Ofglen asked, to which Offred gave her a glare.

Brooklyn stopped walking and sighed. "I hadn't thought about it. Trying to avoid it and praying for the best." She sighed again. "Besides... And you will knew the truth. And the truth will set you free.(John 8:32) Let's just hope not free enough for a double homicide."

"You know... sounds like all of our lives when you think about it." Offred added with a sigh.

They all giggled to their own thoughts and nodded. There was no denying it and each of the women had a sound mind on their current lives.

Ofzev, a handmaid Brooklyn was shopping with, as her partner was at the doctor , walked over and bowed her head.

"I'm done." she said quietly with a smile. She was a few inches taller than Brooklyn with dark brown hair and light eyes.

"No need to bow your head to me sweet girl. Do that only to God. Let's get you home dear girl you are looking a little pale." Brooklyn said as she motioned for the check out counter, while giving the girls a wink.

In another life, Brooklyn would have loved to go for cocktails with them. Dance the night away or even gym trips. Sure she could tell they were more liberal in their views than her conservative, it didn't matter. They valued the American way of life. Freedom. And that's all that mattered at the end of the day. Having deep political differences, but coming together for each other and for your nation. Patriotism ran so deep within Brooklyn. And as she looked at the Gilead flags, she promised herself she would see the red, white, and blue again.

The next morning her hope was short lived, Offred and Oflgen were no where to be seen. Oh there were whispers, there always were. Stability was an illusion. Friends could disappear at any given moment. She knew neither weren't dead at least. Only a Martha was on the wall. Which gave her some small comfort. Sitting on the counter of her kitchen, drinking her smoothie she looked on the bright side. They weren't dead. Which the small voice in the back of her head told her there definitely were worse things than death and Gilead was surely capable of it. And then she was almost positive her doctor couple, the Nelsons, were pregnant. Maybe even herself...She thought shaking her head. She'd test in the morning...Maybe.

Sure enough and much to her excitement, they were indeed pregnant. Two months of treatment was a pretty good turnout, she was impressed, but knew the couple was diligent. And they were rewarded. She estimated they were about four weeks. Still pretty early, and yet still a blessing none the less. Brooklyn was now one third of the way closer to being able to practice permanently.

Jasper was in a good mood when he arrived for dinner later in the afternoon. Surely he must have heard the news of her success.

"Have any news to tell me dear wife?" He asked with a raised brow.

"The Nelsons are pregnant." She replied flatly.

"I was hoping it would be you. It's been two months and you've yet to have your monthly." He shrugged as Cindy handed him a plate.

"You also forget I haven't had one in five months due to starvation. However, I will test in the morning as I've been a little under the weather." she stated while taking a plate from Sesily.

He took her hand and kissed it. "No matter the outcome don't feel pressured. Either way it goes we'll get our miracle darling."

Brooklyn smiled. "Our miracle is never a question of if, it's simply when." Which was the truth, they were both fertile. She looked up to see Cindy glaring, slowly something snapped inside of her.

She leaned forward and kissed Jasper fully on the lips. "I will make you father don't you worry sweetheart."

Jasper leaned back and looked at her. While she had always been her usual sweet self, he had never seen her emotional or full of passion. He vaguely wondered what started it, and he thought of Cindy. The kiss lingered on his lips. Was it passion or possession he wondered as he ate.

Brooklyn smirked as she ate her greens. Cindy looked pissed and Jasper looked puzzled. Exactly everything she wanted. If Cindy really was a lover of Jasper she would have to get rid of her. She was a complication and Brooklyn needed Jasper devoted to her if this was to run smoothly. Beyond that, something she didn't want to acknowledge was the jealousy and rage that bubbled to the surface on occasion. Jasper was her husband. She would not share him with some old plastic old whore.

For three whole weeks, Brooklyn procrastinated taking a pregnancy test. Lately she had been having random bouts of throwing up and general moodiness. Most of which she hid, unless Cindy was around. Offred was finally seen again and now Ofglen was Ofstephen. Emily, she had said her name was. And now Emily was being drug off by the guards after running over a guard, probably killing him. Brooklyn wondered why the woman stopped there. Brooklyn would have driven straight for Canada or into more guards.

"Think it'll be the wall tomorrow?" Offred asked with a sigh.

"It could be anything let's be honest." Brooklyn replied shaking her head.

"How have you been? Haven't seen you as much... well while I've been out that is." Offred asked. Serena did have her locked up for two weeks.

"Pregnant, I think. Pretty sure. Definitely. Just not taking a test to confirm it...because... you know. But hey I got the doctor's wife pregnant." Brooklyn admitted with a shrug.

"Babies are never a bad thing, let's hope for a boy. The husband know?" Offred smiled and patted her hand.

"No and still battling my thoughts over the Martha. The more I think, the more aggressive I get." Brooklyn admitted with a frown. Something she rarely ever did.

"He is your husband and you're treating the relationship as such. So I can't blame you, I think it's perfectly normal."

"Is thinking about how many ways you can murder someone as they're handing you breakfast perfectly normal or healthy?" Brooklyn pondered.

"Is any of this healthy anymore?" Offred countered with a laugh.

"True." Brooklyn sighed. "Under his Eye. Have to run home." Offred waved to her as she left.

Sesily meet her at the door and took the bags gratefully. She could have sent Cindy, but she knew Brooklyn always loved a good walk around noon. Her mornings typically revolved around calling the households of her three patient couples for a quick check in. Then she made a trip to the lake house farm and garden to make sure everything was growing properly and taken care. She then would come home and compare patient data on her laptop or make a vitamin mix for her patient's needs. Depended on the day really, then she'd usually do some yoga and keep with her her own private greenhouse before a walk and grocery run. After coming home, the rest of the day was spent doing whatever she wanted. She would pretend to tend to the household, but Sesily had always done such an amazing job there wasn't much for her to do.

Today she settled on helping Sesily cook, which she never minded to do. She had always loved cooking. Her mother had taught her how to do so at a young age. It was another thing she excelled at doing, cooking was a science really. Her whole life was enveloped in science. It's why she was a doctor so young. An exceptionally high IQ helped, but it was her drive and naturally curiosity that carried her as far as she had gone.

"He can handle spice right?" Brooklyn questioned as she coated Jasper's salmon in various spices. She was making him firecracker salmon.

"Girl yes. He loves it when I cook cajun style."Sesily replied as she fried some rice.

"He especially loves my remolaude dressing. Has for years." Cindy said as she entered the kitchen.

"Good to know." Brooklyn replied without a care as she pan seared a few pieces.

"For someone who doesn't eat animals you sure know how to cook 'em" Cindy remarked as she looked over her shoulder.

Brooklyn shrugged. "I've cooked since I was four. Won Chopped Jr. while I was a senior in college...right before med school."

"And how fair have those accomplishments brought you?" Cindy laughed.

"Well I can read without losing a finger or a hand and you can't, so much further than you." Brooklyn smiled as she flipped the salmon. "Oh and let's not forget I can give the gift of life."

Sesily looked at the two women and laughed. Cindy rolled her eyes as she then returned to the island counter to make bread.

"So why the big dinner?" Cindy asked as she began settling the dough in pans.

"Well Jasper had been mentioning he'd been missing take out lately in the mornings when we cuddle. So I figured as his adored wife, that I might treat him." Brooklyn lied smoothly. Earlier after packing the groceries in, she took the test.

Sesily smirked as she cracked an egg and put in in the middle of the wok. She was glad Brooklyn tortured Cindy whenever possible. She hated her lazy ass.

Brooklyn finished the salmon and placed them on a serving plate, before walking over to her now room temperature rice. She began vinegaring it to her taste before grabbing all that she needed for kimbap(korean sushi). It wasn't long before everything was ready.

She ran upstairs to make sure she looked perfect. Even changed into a nice dress. One that Serena Joy helped her make. It was teal, and had roses and lace embroidered at the shoulders. As she walked down the stairs, Cindy came into view. Brooklyn looked stunning, her curves finally coming back. Cindy stopped walking and sighed as Brooklyn began to walk past her. Cindy grabbed her arm.

"What have you done?" Cindy hissed.

"Something you never could do for him." Brooklyn smiled and pushed the woman away.

Brooklyn walking into the dining and seen Jasper had just sat down, she kissed his cheek on the way to her seat. Cindy walked in with a plate that contained his salmon. It was his favorite and they both knew it.

"Who's idea was this?" Jasper looked up with a smile. He was completely and uttely oblivious, just the way Brooklyn liked him.

"Oh darling there's more." Brooklyn winked as Sesily brought the garlic noodles and ham fried rice. Brooklyn took a helping of the noodles. Which left the final plate of her kimbap with sweet soy sauce.

"Thank you sweetheart this meal is fit for a king." Jasper leaned forward and kissed her on the lips. Cindy was in full view and watching.

Brooklyn smiled, her eyes were glued to Cindy who stood behind Jasper so he had no idea Brooklyn wasn't looking at him. "More like fit for a father." She announced.

Jasper's eyes went wide, full mid slurp and the noodles fell from his mouth. "You're? Really? When?" He was at a loss for words. "Oh baby." He rose from his chair and pulled her into a tight hug and then stopped for a slow and passionate kiss.

"I'll clear some time for us in the afternoon tomorrow and we'll see just how far along with are with our sweet baby...but if I had to guess I think probably... happened our wedding night." Brooklyn said as she took her chair.

"Oh congratulations you two. I can't wait to see this house full of children. They'll be so precious." Sesily said with tears in her eyes. Brooklyn knew she wasn't a zealot like the others, but she also knew the woman loved children.

Cindy slowly made her way towards the kitchen. "Have you nothing to say Cindy?" Brooklyn asked with a huge grin. Jasper turned to her with a hard glare. Cindy momentarily returned the glare. "Congrats. I have work to do."

"Taking the initiative on working... that'd be a first. Dismissed." Brooklyn said with a smile as Jasper took her right hand and kissed it. "Forget the afternoon. I'm taking the whole day off tomorrow with the exception of one meeting late in the afternoon. Let's see the baby in the morning and I'll treat you to a day of whatever you want."

After dinner, they shared a bath together. He cleaned her with expertise and made sure to be gentle. Jasper also took the time to memorize her body. His wife was still muscular, but she was beginning to soften. Especially her breasts and stomach. He placed a hand over her stomach and kissed her. He then reached down and began to rub her clit, which startled her at first and then she deepened her kiss.

He toyed with her until she was close and then stopped. She pouted and glared. "Good things to all those who wait." He teased with a grin before nodding his head towards the bed. Jasper helped her out of the tub and dried them both before laying her down in bed. He then did something he never had before. He worshiped her body with his hands, first a back massage and finally with his tongue. Before long she was screaming his name. And they made love late into the night. Both slept in well late into the morning. He woke first, taking to the time to truly study his wife. She did look young, but also beautiful with her silky blonde hair, high arched brows, and button nose. She also had small, but yet full lips. Her mouth wasn't wide, but it could do the job he mused.

He needed to treat her better. Sure he never treated her badly, he just hadn't invested a lot of time into getting to know her. Brooklyn still remained a mystery most of the time. Jasper knew there was something deeper. She was a smart woman and very methodical. She knew there was something between Cindy and him, and he could tell she was relentless in her quest to find out what. Part of him wanted to send Cindy far from here and another part feared Cindy would get herself killed. She had been in his life for more than half his life and he wasn't ready to let go. Not yet. But he knew, Brooklyn would continue to chip away at the dam until it broke. He was worried for more than one reason. So many things could happen as a result. He feared she'd hate him, after waiting so long to give herself to a man. To her husband. But when that dam broke just who would she let drown? The question echoed in his mind until she woke.


	4. Chapter 4: Bury Me Face Down

I know I said I'd be visiting Brooklyn's life prior to Gilead in this chapter(I do touch on some things though)... but there are some things I needed to do first with the story. And this will be a violent chapter so you are warned and so will the next chapter. Also I have decided to follow into the original Handmaid's characters' stories as well. Just a little bit. As it helps to tie in the timeline.

Please note: I do not own most of the characters within this story. They belong to The Handmaid's Tale, Margaret Atwood, and Hulu. Brooklyn and Jasper are mine though.

 **Chapter 4: Bury Me Face Down**

 _I've been on the run_

 _Since I was a boy_

 _But now I'm done runnin', got another thing comin'_

 _Watch my enemies get destroyed_

 _Oh, I've got troubles of more than one kind_

 _But I never sleep, gotta bury me six feet deep_

 _Where the sun don't shine_

 _Thinkin' that they've won_

 _It's only just begun_

 _When I go into that ground_

 _I won't go quietly, I'm bringin' my crown_

 _When I go into that ground_

 _Oh, they gotta bury me, bury me face down_

Sitting on the counter, Brooklyn watched Nina breastfeed her son and drink a smoothie at the same time.

"You always did know how to multitask..." She said as she drank her own smoothie.

"Don't you worry sis, you'll be doing it too." Nina retorted with a smirk.

Matthew entered and shook his head. He was used to mornings like this. Nina always was eccentric and she was always herself when home unless they had Gilead guests. It's what made the house a home. Happy wife, happy life indeed.

"We're getting a new Commander General, votes are swaying towards Commander Trotsky... heavily." He stated as he grabbed his own smoothie from the counter.

"Yikes, Philips never had a chance." Brooklyn commented with a sigh.

Commander Erik Trotsky was frightening in a way, he was known for two things: brutality and accountability. The man was absolutely thorough with everything he done and even more so deadly on the battlefield. Brooklyn knew he had been in the old US Army with an amazing track record. He was command within the Rangers. Brooklyn had met the man when she was about thirteen. He had served under her father. He had the coldest ice blue eyes she had ever seen, almost white in a way, and very light blonde hair. Now that she thought about it, the man reminded her of the perfect Nazi or at the very least Lebensborn. He nailed the looks and menacing behavior for the part.

"Hopefully he'll stay out of the region. Fiends fucked up by never going to the battlefield personally and keeping his lazy ass in DC. It's why Chicago was lost. Trotsky is..."

"Here, there...Everywhere." Brooklyn finished for Matthew with a sigh.

"We do have very low occurrence rates here." Nina stated with a smile.

"There is one thing..."Matthew said looking at Brooklyn tentatively.

"Oh God...Which is?" she sighed.

"He absolutely hates your husband. Has for years." Matthew finished and took a big chug of his smoothie in an attempt to finish it. He had the full green smoothies.

"Awesome starting to make two of us. I really do think he has fucked the Martha. And still is."

"You need to get rid of her then and we all know it." Nina said with a lifted brow.

Brooklyn smiled. "I'm deeply aware, just waiting for the opportunity."

"You always did have a special degree of patience." Matthew said with a sigh, before giving the smoothie a final chug.

"Oh stop being a baby." Nina chided.

"Babies are the only reason I'm doing this woman!" he scowled.

From there the day was good. She met with the Parsons' couple. Not pregnant yet, but both reported feeling better than they ever had in their lives. His sperm count was up and the tails had good rotation finally. It was only a matter of time for those two. That perked her up. Later in the day, she got a call from Commander Waterford to meet him at his office. Which was odd, she hadn't seen much of him since right before and after her judgement.

He was signing paperwork when she arrived. He quickly rose to greet her and offered a chair in front of his desk. She smiled and sat in the black leather chair.

"Blessed be the fruit." She greeted.

"May the Lord Open." he replied with a smile and looked at her. "Pregnancy suits you, still not showing, but you do have the glow."

"Thank you sir. What can I help you with today?"

"I've noticed you're friends with our Handmaid and as you know she's a lovely woman. I believe you spoke to the Justice Council about an amendment for Commanders to marry their Handmaid if a child is produced. Is that correct?" His attention focused on her.

She swallowed, not completely reading his intentions. She was sure he wasn't hostile. "Correct, I'm not the only one supporting the amendment, nor am I the sponsor of it. The way the bible was written in Hebrew is very clear on marriage and especially when it speaks about Bilhah. The wording is very precise." She pauses to look at him and he's hung on every word. "And she gave him, her handmaid to wife. It's very literal in that sense, especially in Hebrew. Babies know from birth who their mother is, while we can produce babies at better rates than other counties we still hold an incredibly high infant mortality rate. Which is not due to illnesses. It's due to failure to thrive babies. These instances only happen when the baby and mother handmaid are separated."

"So you believe it's biblical law to do such a thing and especially now for the sake of our children?" He questioned.

"Yes, I do. We kill citizens for endangering children, yet we do it continuously for the sake of pleasing wives and relieving them of their jealousy. It's disgusting and an offense to God."

"There is a lot of debate going on with this and it's going to take months to pass, but I will support the claim as even the biblical scholars are agreeing. I do have one thing to ask of you."

Brooklyn stared back at him. "Anything, Commander."

He shifted in his seat. "I need you to test and treat me to make sure I can get Offred pregnant. We need to be discreet around my wife. Also I read your input as well as other medical professionals on the mental states on the handmaids if the amendment passes they will be allowed to take their names back when married."

Brooklyn straightened and smiled again. "I'd be glad to, I will need a...sample as well as blood work from you. And if this is to work you need to change some habits...especially eating."

Fred laughed. "I knew you'd say that. I've been reading up on your protocol. Very interesting, I'll have my driver deliver the sample tonight."

"I can actually do the blood work now if you like. I carry supplies with me."

Fred nodded and offered his arm. The process took less than five minutes and Fred didn't even flinch. Brooklyn was worried for Offred. She knew Serena Joy hated her. She really hated any woman her husband paid attention to. Betrayed a whole nation only to be put in the sidelines, the thought made her smile as she walked home.

She beelined straight for the basement where her equipment was and start running the blood. She had called ahead and let Jasper know she'd be busy until much later, which he was ok with. He said he'd see her in the morning and that he was going to sleep in his room tonight. When she came back up two hours later, she noticed the house was quiet. Sesily had left her a plate out, spaghetti with zoodles and Italian bread with garlic. She sat there, enjoying the silence as she ate. She had stared at her empty plate for five minutes thinking.

Curiosity filled her mind about Fred and his intentions. Offred rarely spoke of him, other to say he was kind and treated her well. Maybe he was falling for her. Maybe he was obsessive. Or maybe he was just tired of Serena Joy. All seemed like definite possibilities. Then again the possibilities were always endless in the hell that was Gilead. She wondered if Offred would find it an offense to help Fred get her pregnant. When weighing the options, when her post was up she'd have one more post before she'd be considered a non-woman. And the new commander probably would be sterile. In the end it meant a death sentence to June.

And then she heard it, a faint knocking noise coming from Jasper's study. She bit her lip with an inkling of a feeling of what she'd find behind the door. Taking a deep breath, she began walking towards the door. It was locked. Brooklyn pulled two bobby pins from her pun and began picking the lock with expertise. Wouldn't be the first and certainly not the last. With her ear to the door she heard the whore moaning, his groans, and it filled her belly with fire. After hearing the lock click, she reformed the pins and put them back in her bun. She took a deep breath and popped her neck before carefully opening the door.

It felt like it took her forever to process what was happening, but in reality it was only milliseconds. Cindy was bound in black rope with a ballgag in her mouth, it was black with a red ball. Jasper was behind her, pumping himself full on into her ass. He held her arm at odd angle to hold her onto the desk.

"You take it so good you little cumdump." He stated with a smile, pulling down the gag.

"Always your little cumdump, master. Much better than the prude." she moaned.

"You take it better than her, then again you always have. Always have to treat her like the fragile flower she is."

"Fuck me Jasper, unlike her I won't break." And he did move harder, obviously getting close.

Brooklyn was in shock and then the rage came. It was swift as it always was and her adrenaline soared and she felt invincible, like a true force of nature. She moved before even she realized what she was doing. Her body launched forward, grabbing Jasper by the hair of his head she bent low and flipped him backwards over her body to disconnect the two. His body slammed against the chairs with a low thud. Cindy had just registered something was wrong when Brooklyn had her head gripped and slammed it hard on the desk face first. Brooklyn then half drug her body towards the window kicking her body as they moved, when she reached it Jasper finally came to from his daze and realized the attacker was his wife. Brooklyn smashed Cindy's head through the the glass.

A long jagged shard was left at the bottom. Jasper noticed and so did his wife. She knocked Cindy's feet from under her, tripping the older woman with ease. Her cries were muffled by the gag as Brooklyn placed it back in her mouth. And then a strong set of arms pulled her backwards and flung her towards the desk. She half fell against it, using the desk to regain her balance.

"I'm pregnant and you dare touch me to protect that whore!" Brooklyn screamed as she came to her feet.

Cindy was freely crying now, she clung to Jasper's leg like a child and it made Brooklyn sick. Brooklyn smiled as she pulled the switchblade from her boot. The rage quietened finally which left her with her cold adrenaline, training, and instincts. Her body launched again, her foot connecting with Cindy's face and her fist to Jasper's throat. As Cindy's body fell back, she stabilized her footing before bringing up her knee into his unprotected and still fully hard groin. It amazed even her that he was so unprepared for her attacks. He backhanded her in response and she hadn't even flinched, she brought the knife and stabbed into his right shoulder. Twisting the knife, he howled in pain pushing her back and tearing the knife and his wife from his body.

Brooklyn regained her footing, when they heard a gun cock back. They all paused and Brooklyn turned her heard to see their driver Jace aiming the gun, not at her but Jasper.

"How dare you!" Jasper roared.

"I have my orders from the General and she's pregnant." Jace said without a care in the world. Brooklyn smiled to him.

"Now you two are to get dressed and we are all taking a trip to the hospital." Jace informed them. "You ok ma'am?" Jace looked at her.

"We're bleeding and you're worried about her?" Cindy stammered.

Brooklyn's head tilted, still realizing the blade was in her hand she threw it at Cindy. It landed right by her head, grazing her right cheek leaving a long cut.

"Get dressed, now. If I have to say it to either of you again you'll be leaving in body bags." Jace reiterated all warmth long gone from his voice. "Her womb is more precious than either of your lives." he added for further insult. Brooklyn moved to retrieve her switchblade.

She then waited by the door with Jace who was checking her for injuries. "Were you hurt at all?" Jace questioned. Brooklyn shook her head no. "He just pushed me into the desk and slapped me that's all."

"Just shut the fuck up and get dressed woman." they heard Jasper yell.

Sesily came from the stairs with a fresh dress for Brooklyn. " For the ride home. I'll clean the mess soon ma'am."

Brooklyn smiled and shook her head. "Leave it for the whore when we get back. You're done cleaning her messes. But please get someone to replace the window if possible." she replied sweetly.

Sesily moved back towards the dining room, probably to clean Brooklyn's discarded dinner remains. Brooklyn sighed feeling absolutely physically and mentally drained.

"What do you think the General will do?" Brooklyn looked to Jace.

"You have nothing to worry about ma'am. You did no wrong. As for your husband, I assume he'll keep this under wraps without punishment until you give birth. Hopefully by then the new widow laws will have came into affect. As for the Martha, that's for you decide. You can kill her, send her to the colonies, or keep her here."

"If I keep her here will you be able to further testify to Jasper's infidelity?"

Jace smiled. "The General said you were a smart woman. Yes ma'am I will."

The two finally emerged from the study, Cindy had kept a hand on Jasper's shoulder to keep him from bleeding. They all left for the black Tahoe sitting in the driveway. The drive was eerily quiet for the most part.

"You're a doctor and you're not even checking on your husband." Jasper groaned.

"Does it look like I have a suture kit? Your whore is doing just fine." Brooklyn retorted from the front seat. "Stop being a little baby, the knife didn't even go as deep as I had hoped."

The ride stayed quiet after that and Brooklyn was glad of it. She was exhausted and just wanted sleep. To escape this situation and go straight into the sanctuary of her dreams. Jace opened her door and then walked all four of them in once they arrived. "We need to get her checked right now to make sure the baby is ok and those two need patched up. Male has a stab wound to the right collarbone that needs to be looked at stat."

The man working the check in wasted no time in getting Brooklyn in a wheelchair. A guard pushed her to the maternity ward. Brooklyn was happy to see Dr. Nelson and that he'd be attending to her. He returned to her once she was dressed in a hospital gown and laying on the table.

"I'm at 16 weeks, can we look at the gender of the baby?" Brooklyn asked.

"Hold on we're just trying to make sure the baby is ok."

"The baby is fine, trust me." Brooklyn replied. She truly hadn't felt any different and the baby was happily moving.

"Indeed, momma knows best. Heart rate is perfect. She's going to be just fine."Dr. Nelson said as he pointed to the image. Brooklyn muttered fuck, under her breath and looked at the image.

A girl. Brooklyn breathed deeply, a boy she could raise here, but not a girl. She'd have to find a way to get the baby to Canada or find a way to give birth there and make it look like an abduction. Another wrench in her plans, among many now. Jasper would be a problem, but with the affair out in the open she could easily push Cindy at Jasper to keep him entertained.

"Can I have a printout?" Brooklyn asked with a smile.

"Certainly. Looks like our own little angel will have a friend." He smiled as he began printing a picture.

" The women in my family tend to give birth a little early, so they'll be close." Brooklyn said as she cleaned the gel from her barely showing belly. One would have to look real close to know she was pregnant.

"They also must be late showers as well."

She smiled again. "My mother didn't show with my brothers until the 4th or 5th month and I was a surprise baby well into Mom's 40s so... Mom thought she was getting a little pudgy until she felt me kicking."

"Thanks Dr. Blake, we're in our late 30s and never thought a baby was possible. You're a God send."

"You're more than welcome. Thanks for letting me practice medicine on you guys as a trial. It's the only thing I've ever wanted to do since I was a little girl. To make the world better."

He smiled and left her to get dressed. It wasn't until she was changed that she noticed her split lip. Blood was on the dress she changed out of. She checked the mirror, her lip wasn't that bad. She patted away the dried blood on her chin and neck before making her way back to the lobby. Jace was waiting.

"Baby good?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Great and a girl apparently." Brooklyn replied with a smile while sitting across from him.

"The lovebirds are getting stitched up. You did quite a number for a woman so small. She had a broken nose, contusions, a few broken ribs, and of course facial cuts. His collarbone is broken, I guess you did that before I got there and he's getting 15 stitches." Jace reported.

"Oh probably when I pulled him over my back and slammed him to get him off her so I could get to her."

"You must have quite the hidden temper." He tsked.

"And if you caught your wife with another man?" Brooklyn countered. "I'm willing to bet there would be body bags."

"You're not wrong." he replied with a grin.

It was maybe an hour later when Cindy and Jasper were done. Brooklyn felt awfully proud of her handy work while Jace shook his head at her smile. Both had looked like they survived a war zone. Cindy's eyes were already bruising and her cheek would scar. Hopefully a reminder to keep her hand's off what wasn't hers. Although at this point, Cindy could have him. All respect and feelings for Jasper had simply evaporated from Brooklyn's mind the moment she laid eyes on their infidelity. He ruined an otherwise healthy good marriage.

"Well let's load up children and remember to play nice when we get home." Jace advised lowly.

"No need, I don't play with tainted toys." Brooklyn remarked as she made her way to the Tahoe her head held high.

If they didn't know any better, one would think Brooklyn was a Queen marching to her throne. They all followed her lead and loaded up without another word.

"General Trotsky informed me that he'll be here in two days. He's going to have a word with you Commander Walker." Jace said as they drove. He looked to Brooklyn and seen her smirk. She must have known Erik wasn't happy with Jasper in general, but with this situation she had absolutely no idea was the icing on the cake.

"Two days? He just got confirmed." Jasper stated with a sigh. "Can he really afford to be on the move so quickly."

"Unlike his predecessor, he doesn't plan to stay within DC and hide like a coward. He's in Chicago taking it back as we speak. He gets the job done, something I would hope you'll start to follow in." Jace replied.

"How dare you speak to me like that. I'll have you replaced by noon." Jasper roared.

"No you won't. Pryce nor Trotsky would allow it. Besides I have to make sure the wife is safe." Jace snickered.

"I think she can take care of herself." Jasper replied with a scowl.

"I have no doubt in that, but orders are orders. And if anything should happen to her while I'm not around both of you will be executed. Very painfully, General Trotsky informed me." He announced as they pulled into the driveway.

Jace pulled up to a black Mercedes and parked. He opened Brooklyn's door. They found Nick, the Waterford's driver waiting inside. The sample, Brooklyn knew.

"Everything ok here?" He questioned.

"For now yes. Hopefully it'll stay that way. Tell you about it in a few minutes." Jace replied.

Cindy and Jasper disappeared to their prospective rooms without another word and Brooklyn felt relief in that. She hated dealing with awkwardness. Nick handed her the sample in a bio-hazard container.

"Oh thank you Nick, if you guys will excuse me." She smiled and made her way to the basement to start the analysis. It would probably run all night.

The two drivers were still talking when Brooklyn came back up. Eyes, she told herself. It would make sense for the drivers to be Eyes. They were the closet to the Commanders and had easy access to the rest of the household. Sesily came into view with a tea cup.

"Some chamomile and honey, to help you sleep dear." Sesily said as she handed it to her.

"Thank you Sesily, go get some rest yourself. I'll be more than fine."

Sesily nodded and walked towards her room. Brooklyn then took a vitamin bottle from her pocket and handed it to Nick.

"Tell your commander that he needs to take this in the morning, with a fruit and green smoothie. No dairy. No meat, nothing from an animal. He can cheat once a week with seafood preferably salmon or shrimp. If his headaches get worse to give me a call, especially if he goes into a full migraine. Also inform your Martha of the dietary change. If she needs help let me know. Sesily and I will happily do so." Brooklyn was stern in her voice, but smiled at the end.

"Ah now it makes sense. Migraines again. Normally he goes for the doped up route." Nick replied as he took the bottle.

"When you live with pain long enough you seek alternatives. Especially those which contend with the root of your problem. Pain medication just relieves symptoms that will always come back." She replied.

"So where did you learn to fight like that?" Nick asked with a raised brow.

"Oh you didn't know? My dad is an American General. General Robert Blake. He's taught me combat training since I could walk."

"Our General served under him for almost a decade in the Rangers. He was always strict on the kids from what I heard. She was the baby and his favorite." Jace added.

"How'd you know that?" Brooklyn looked up before sipping her tea.

"He always doted on you. I was also under him, mostly deployed while you were in college. You were his pride and joy, everyone knew it."

Brooklyn smiled and said her good night. Thoughts of her dad put her in a good mood. She was very fortunate to have a good dad, well to have a good family in general. Her older brother Nathan was with her father, neither were heavily religious like Matthew and her. Her mother was, but they all knew she was better off in Canada with the rest of the family. She had an infamous temper, one that would probably get her killed in Gilead. Without much thought or resistance she drifted off to sleep with ease once in her bed.

The morning was rather quiet. Jasper had not spoken a word at the table during breakfast. Cindy did help serve it, but kept her eyes to the floor the whole time. It was as if she was trying to be invisible. Normally, this was something Brooklyn would relish in, but she couldn't help but think this was the calm before the storm. The eye of a hurricane. Though, she didn't feel tension from Jasper. He acted like a wounded dog, tucking his tail between his legs around her. Dread filled the pit of her stomach and she couldn't figure out why.

After breakfast, she went back down to the basement to get the results from Waterford's sperm analysis. Her head tilted as she looked at the screen, his count was average, but the condition of the sperm was the issue. Thankfully, the head of the sperm seemed fully intact, the tail was completely gone. It wasn't a huge issue compared to most, diet change and vitamin therapy would do it. Fred was a fairly fit man, so no weight issues made things easier. Most tails disappeared due to lack of essential nutrients. The proteins could no longer build to sustain the tail due to lack of amino acids. It was the reason for 90% of male infertility.

Coming back up, she grabbed the grocery sack and an umbrella before heading over to the Waterford house. She needed to speak with Rita about how to cook for Fred and subsequently Offred. Rita was shocked none the less. Serena was thankfully off visiting Naomi Putnam. Two sadistic cunts in a pea pod, Brooklyn thought as she began going over recipes with Rita. Brooklyn liked Rita, she was smart, no nonsense, and an absolute survivor.

"So what am I gonna for coffee creamer for Fred in the mornings?" Rita asked as she looked at the pantry trying to map out a new meal plan.

"I'll have Sesily come later and teach you. We'll bring the supplies. But if I were you, I'd always keep some almonds or cashews for creamy sauces and cashew for cheesy ones. For creamer it'll be soaked almonds, lacuma powder, water, and honey blended. You can always add hazelnuts or vanilla as needed to suit their tastes."

"And you think this will really help the commander?" Rita asked.

"Of course, he'll be more energetic and feel pretty good after about two weeks. He'll be cranky for the first week or so." Brooklyn replied as she seen Offred coming her way.

"Blessed be the fruit." Brooklyn greeted with a small smile.

"May the Lord open. Shopping?" Offred replied equally smiling, until she noticed Brooklyn's lip.

"Indeed, I do believe your partner is outside." Brooklyn nodded towards the door.

"What happened?" Offred whispered as they left the house.

"Husband, don't worry my friend he looks worse than I do and so does the whore martha." Brooklyn grinned.

"Yikes. Did you hear the new General will be here tomorrow?" Offred shook her head. It had been guessed a while ago that Brooklyn's husband was unfaithful.

"Yeah and I know him. He hates my husband so this should be amusing. Oh smile the perfect little handmaid is around the corner." Neither really liked Ofglen #2 very much.

At the store, they met Ofzev and Offrank. Ofzev was also glowing like Brooklyn and barely showing. She was excited about the pregnancy in general. Which was odd, but the sweet girl always had loved babies. Babies also meant you weren't going to the colonies.

"What the hell is this list?" Offred complained as she mentally recited it.

"Fred is doing a diet change and so are you." Brooklyn whispered and their eyes met. Offred recoiled for a moment and shook her head.

"For the best you think?" Offred questioned keeping her voice down as to not attract Ofglen's attention.

"You only have one more post after this and you're going to the colonies. Fred is willing to try, the next commander is probably sterile and probably won't care to change that fact. I wouldn't do it unless it was in your best interest." Brooklyn replied with serious eyes.

"It would get Serena off my back as well." Offred shrugged as she stuffed a few oranges in her bag.

All five of them were walking towards home when Ofzev stopped walking. Brooklyn immediately walked towards her. Ofzev winced and Brooklyn took a deep breath.

"We have to get you the hospital quickly." Brooklyn told the scared girl.

They were trying to cross the bridge when two guardians stopped them.

"Excuse us, we need to back." Brooklyn told them as they looked up.

"Your bags are full there is no need. Go home." the tall younger one told her.

"It's not an option this is important, it's life or dea-" Brooklyn told him looking dead into his cold brown eyes.

"Your only option is whatever I tell you it is you stupid bitch." He backhanded her and then brought his knee to her midsection. The blow stunned her and brought her to her knees. She brought her arm down to shield her stomach, but it didn't matter, his boot kicked her head.

"Stop she's..." she heard Ofzev yelled and then it was cut off as Brooklyn heard the girl get hit and drop.

Brooklyn was trying her hardest to move, curling into a ball, but her vision was blurring and her body weakening. The last she heard before her world went black the squeal of brakes hitting by them.

Offred came running to Jace who had just exited the Tahoe.

"The handmaid is pregnant too." she spat out. Jace was already in action with another guardian at his side, getting the women into the SUV.

"What's the big fucking deal?" the young guardian asked.

Jace turned after securing Brooklyn and and slammed the kid's head into door.

"The big fucking deal is that you just assaulted the General's Deputy Commander of the District's wife who is pregnant. The handmaid is pregnant. You just endangered two babies' lives because you had to prove your dick size, Smith." Jace yelled.

"Who hit the handmaid?" Jace asked the group of handmaid's.

"The other guardian." Offred answered pointing to the shorter guardian.

"Chase." Jace nodded to the guardian who was with him.

In an instant, Chase had the guardian on the ground in handcuffs with his gun in hand. A Mercedes pulled up next. Nick exited the vehicle with another pulling up behind him.

"Handle this I need to go now." Jace told him as he got into the Tahoe and sped off towards the hospital. Nick nodded and walked to another set of Guardians to bark orders. They quickly grabbed the two arrested guardians and loaded up.

"Ladies get in the car. I'll be taking you home." His voice was neutral as ever, but Offred could tell by the look in his eyes that he was worried.

After the last handmaid was drooped off Offred finally spoke. "Can you let me know what happens with Brooklyn if you don't mind?"

Nick looked to her and nodded. "I will, but I don't think there is going to be a happy ending with this situation."

"I know." Offred replied softly. Nick reached over and squeezed her hand. Just last night he had been forced to have sex with her due to Serena's bidding.

"Are you okay though? Did I hurt you last night? I tried to be gentle." He felt both guilty and worried.

"Yes. Worried about her, she's the only real friend I have. You were fine you didn't hurt me. And don't feel bad, you did what you had to. We're all forced to do what we don't want to survive. I don't feel any bad towards you."

Nick took a deep breath, "I could've refused and reported her, but you only have one posting after this and... You seem nice...I don't want you to die and certainly not in the colonies."

"Thank you, Nick." She said it like she meant it and she really did.

Hours later, just before dawn Brooklyn awake in the hospital. Her hand went to her stomach and she knew the baby was gone. Nina sat in the bed with her and held her as she cried for hours.

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them. For the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you." (Deuteronomy 31:8)

Nina knew Brooklyn was about to come as unhinged as anyone would see her.

"I want to see my baby." Brooklyn said after looking up. Nina nodded and walked her to where the body was after carefully disconnecting her IVs.

Brooklyn stared at her daughter's corpse. She was tiny of course, but what struck a nerve with her was that her baby girl's skull was cruelly caved in. Her daughter died in pain, in the womb where she was supposed to be safest.

"Where is he?" Brooklyn asked as she looked up with the cruelest look Nina had ever witnessed on her best friend's face. Nina didn't even have to question who "he" was. The bells started tolling and Brooklyn took a breath. A particution. When she looked to Nina again, Nina had almost not recognized her.


End file.
